What Do You Want Your 2021 to Look Like?
I think it’s safe to say bidding farewell to 2020 was a highlight to the start of 2021. And while there are positive things on the horizon, it’s an understatement to say 2021 has continued to bestow us with challenges. Such is life and the storms it presents. There’s a Yiddish saying, “When man plans, God laughs.” If that’s true, I’m pretty sure God is in hysterics. Unfortunately, there is no magic wand, button or timeframe for those challenges to just disappear along with the stress associated with them.
With a pandemic, civil unrest, and let’s not forget the California fires in 2020, it would be surprising if our stress didn’t increase over the last year. The pandemic alone was enough to cause that. Remember toilet paper shortages? Who knew running out of TP was a thing. Now we’re in 2021 and a mob takes over the Capitol on January 6th. What year and universe are we in?! Needless to say, my news consumption that week was off the charts and no doubt added to my discomfort and uncertainty.
Stress is a part of our lives. We experienced it before the craziness of 2020, and we will experience it after everything subsides. As individuals we don’t have control over the virus, the government, and violence from others, etc. What IS in our control is how we deal with the stress. One place to start is how we view it. Is it a learning opportunity or a pain in the a**? Maybe it’s both. What if you viewed it as more of a learning opportunity? What would change for you then? I’m not implying your level of Zen would match that of the Dali Lamas, but sometimes a small shift can make a big difference.
What can we do when we’re faced with a continued pandemic, and civil unrest while juggling our daily lives? If your answer is to continue doing what you’ve been doing, my question to you would be, “How satisfied are you with the results you are getting?” Are there things you keep hoping will change and they’re not? Some people might say they’ve been doing all they can and that’s good enough. Maybe it is, but don’t you deserve better than good enough?
How do you take care of yourself when the uncertainty of life washes over you? Have you ever thought about making stress your friend? What would that look like? For those of us that rely on self-care, this past year has challenged us to rely on that like a life preserver. Do you know what works for you? Are there activities you engage in that help you work through the storms of life? Maybe it’s reaching out to a friend, exercise, meditation, being creative or allowing yourself to grieve. Did you adopt a pet, take up yoga, give back to the community in some way? If you live with your family have you been able to get time alone? If you live alone have you been able to connect with others?
The first of the year usually signifies a time to start fresh and implement the resolution(s) you decided on. As most of us know, resolutions don’t necessarily last. Picture your local gym in January compared to March. Everyone has good intentions and most people start out with a bang until the wheels fall off. So, why don’t resolutions usually stick? In general, people unknowingly set themselves up for failure with resolutions that aren’t specific enough. For example, I want to be more fit vs. I want to run a 5K by May. Setting attainable goals and incorporating small habit changes into your life will better support whatever resolution(s) you’ve chosen.
How do you want your 2021 to be? What do you need to do differently in order to make that happen? Do you first have to believe and trust that you can make it happen? How can a coach help you get what you want? Have you ever felt better about something after you’ve said it out loud to a friend? Sometimes expressing what we’ve been thinking can provide us with a new perspective or how we feel about it becomes clearer. The nice thing about having a coach is that a coach doesn’t judge you and whatever you share is completely confidential. When you’re regularly working with a coach there’s built-in accountability and support.
As a life, career and wellness coach, I support my clients through various challenges by working with them on their character strengths (an approach based on science of positive psychology). How can your strength of humor help you get through adversity? I know it has helped me even when I haven’t necessarily felt like laughing. Maybe your character strengths of hope, perspective or leadership can help you stay on track for your 2021 goals or determine what those goals are.
We all have choices, are you going to be resigned or are you going to take action and do something different? You deserve the support to have what you want in 2021.